For Your Safety

I am getting sick of companies telling us that their incompetence is "for your convenience" or "for your safety".

Statement	Translation
For your safety, the flight is being delayed 30 minutes for an additional inspection	We scheduled our flights too close together
For safety, please re-enter your password	We couldn't get our system to transfer your information from one department to another
For your safety, no beverages are allowed in the facility	We want you to pay $2 for our water bottles
For your convenience, we have provided...	So you can do it yourself and we can hire fewer people, we have provided...
For your convenience, press '1' for our automated help system	Please try to figure out your problem so we don't have to talk to you