Infinite Loop at the Gym

Thank goodness I bring my own music to the gym, because the music they play has the following play list...

1. Blurred Lines (Robin Thicke)
2. Brave (Sara Bareilles)
3. Safe and Sound (Capital Cities)
4. Titanium (David Guetta)
5. repeat...

Groupon Marketing Gimmicks

It's pretty interesting to see all of the Marketing 101 gimmicks that are pulled by a typical Groupon.  The above item is a classic example:

1. Herd Mentality - "Over 640 Bought" - Everyone wants to do what the group is doing
2. Bait and Switch - "From $19" - When you click the arrow, you get to see what the real price will be
3. Anchoring - "Value $64.95" - Does I really typically pay $65 for an oil change?
4. False Savings - "Discount 71%" - What you are saving is irrelevant.  The important result is that you end up spending about the same as what one would typically spend on an oil change.
5. "Limited Time, Act Now" - All of these deals either imply or actually have a limited time to make a snap decision
6. "Limited Quantity" - Yep, nothing like combining the Limited Time and Limited Quantity pitch in the same offer

I admit, I've actually bought crappy items or services from Groupon where I really thought I was getting a huge savings, but then found out later I was paying a pretty typical price for what turned out to be inferior items or services.

Maybe people realizing this would be why Groupon stock has lost over half its value since its debut.

ADT Security System

I love this coupon we got in the mail from ADT for a "FREE 16-PIECE Home Security System":

If you look at the photo, you will quickly observe:

• The first 7 "pieces" of the 16-PIECE system (44%) are a yard sign and 6 stickers
• The "FREE" system costs only a $99 installation charge, plus "purchase of monthly alarm services"

That deal really sets off my alarms.

Window Ads

On rare occasion, I am taking a short trip so I decide to listen to the radio, instead of a podcast.  No matter what station I listen to, the one thing I know for sure is that there will be ads for window companies.  These commercials are always insufferable:

1. They always have some phone number that they repeat 7 or 8 times at the end of the ad.  Does anyone actually remember these numbers?  They should just say the name of the company 8 times so people can search for it on Google.

2. The special offers are ridiculous.  I swear I actually heard this one yesterday: "Some window companies have lousy specials that are only 10% or 20% off.  But for a limited time we are offering 40% OFF!!  That's right, buy one window and get the second one for 40% off."

Sigh...

Nationals "Run The Bases"

We took the kids to a Washington Nationals baseball game on Sunday 4/28/13.  They were offering a special "Run The Bases" promotion, where kids would get to run once around the bases on the field after the conclusion of the game.

It started lightly drizzling in the 6th inning, and within a few minutes they flashed a big note across the scoreboard: "Due to the hazardous conditions, the Run The Bases event has been cancelled."

This is an outrage.  First of all, it has nothing to do with the hazardous conditions.  They just don't want there to be any damage to the field.  If they really think the running could somehow damage the field (?), then they should just come out and say that is the reason.  Second, there is nothing more hazardous about slightly moist dirt than dry dirt.  If anything, the dry dirt would be more slippery and more likely to cause a scrape than the moist dirt.  Did someone run a study comparing injuries resulting from different field conditions?

Regardless, I see no reason that a child's parents can't assess the field condition and make a reasonable decision about whether it is hazardous.  There is a calculation that needs to be done, for any activity, as to whether the value gained from the activity outweighs the potential risk, given the probability of that risk.  The Nationals decided to go ahead and make that decision for everyone.  No worry for them - they already sold the tickets and don't need to issue and refunds, so why bother?

Maybe they should just put up a message during every kids event: "Due to potential terrorist activity, for your safety today's kids event has been cancelled"

This whole episode is just bad PR for the Nationals for no good reason.

Southwest Stupidity

I find the latest trend of vendors demanding your email address to be real annoying.

Recently, while on the way to the airport, I needed to add a car rental to my travel arrangements with Southwest Airlines.  The agent would not make the rental arrangement without me giving an email address.  It did not matter that I had no interest in giving my email address.  I would not be reading my email until well after I had rented the car.  I gave them a cell phone# to reach me at, since that would be the only way to contact me until I arrived at my destination to rent the car.

How did rental car companies manage to rent cars before people had email?

If you disagree with me, you can contact me the same way Southwest can, at kissmyass@gmail.com.



Note:  I do not actually have the email address kissmyass@gmail, somebody beat me to it.

Gift Card Mall

I received a $100 VISA gift card for Christmas from a relative.  They got the gift card from something called "Gift Card Mall".  When I went to register the card, I realized that it is a scam designed so that only a fraction of the recipients can actually register the card and spend their money.

I went to the website to register the card.  (There is no phone number, so I guess if you don't have internet access you are already a loser in the GiftCardMall competition).  Here is the registration page:

Note that I need to enter the card number, "Activation Code", and CAPTCHA security code.  When I clicked on "where can I find this?" for the "Activation Code", it said I had to get it from the letter that came with the card.  You know, that letter that you toss in the trash when you get a card?  So anyone who discarded this letter is now another loser in the GiftCardMall competition.

Fortunately, after a 10 minute search I was able to fish the letter out of my recycle bin.  Sure enough, I look at the letter and it says "Activation Code: Mailed To Purchaser".  Twenty minutes in, still no Activation Code.

So now I need to call the person who sent me the gift card and ask them if they happened to save the letter they received (probably weeks or months ago) with the magical "Activation Code".

I'll bet about 40% of the people who get these cards never end up using them.

By the way, even if I somehow get the Activation Code, there is more work in my future.  Here is another gem in small print at the bottom of the activation page, that I haven't even started to deal with yet:

For Visa Gift Card recipients:
We also recommend that you register your Visa Gift Card to take advantage of special offers.
Registering your card will allow you to make online purchases or will assist you if your card is ever
lost or stolen. 

Registering your Visa Gift Card: 

•   . If your Visa card number begins with 441669, go to www.GiftCardMall.com/visagift.
•   . If your Visa card number begins with 403446 or 435880, go to www.GiftCardMall.com/mygift.

Just Over an Hour

I went to the website for the upcoming "Pickin in the Panhandle" BBQ event.  Once I turned off my speaker to stop the loud banjo music, I was pleasantly surprised to see that this event was located "just over an hour from Washington, DC and Baltimore, MD":

Let's take a closer look.  Here are the directions from Washington, DC.  Note that the fastest route is over 2 hours!

Here are the directions from Baltimore, MD  Note that the fastest route is again about 2 hours.

This is not even counting the likely traffic for all of the people traveling to this small town.  These people have no respect for my time.  I grade this marketing three smelly pigs bottoms.

For the Children

Lately it seems that anything can be done for the protection of children.

Case in point #1.  Our Elementary school newsletter never lists the last names of students.  So you get a ridiculous article like this: "The following students have been selected as Student of the Month for September: John B., Ashley G., and Joseph S."  Seriously, why bother?  I have no idea who these people are.  Are we really protecting them by not listing last names?  Are there a bunch of pedophiles who have a directory of last names and addresses, and are waiting for the school newsletter to come out each month?  I really feel sorry for these poor kids.

Ok, item #2 is the following article I recently saw on a local website:

So it is suspicious now to watch children at play?  What ever happened to the old guy at the park feeding the pigeons?  I hope when I get old, they do not have laws about watching children play, or taking pictures of random people on the street.  All I can say is, if Norman Rockwell were alive today he would be serving consecutive life sentences for observing youth.

Ready4Repair

A few years ago, we ordered a Groupon for a maid service.  We made an appointment and waited for them to show up.  Except they never did.  We finally got a hold of them and they said they didn't have the staff to cover their appointments (?) and we got a refund.

Forgetting about the above experience, a few months ago I decided to purchase a Specialicious offer for a garage door tune-up.  I called the guy (Ready4Repair  703-585-0422  www.ready4repair.com) and made an appointment for July 30.  The guy never showed up.  Calls went directly to voice mail.  E-mail was not answered.  Finally, he called back and we re-scheduled for August 2.  Guy never showed up again.  Calls went directly to voice mail.  E-mail was not answered.  Finally, he called back and we re-scheduled for August 3.  First thing in the morning, so there could be no issues that crop up.  Guy never showed up again (third time).  Calls went directly to voice mail.  E-mail was not answered.

Refund from Specialicious requested.

Moral of story - never order something from any of these coupon sites unless it is a company that you are personally familiar with

XBOX for the Mathematically Illiterate

Microsoft recently announced a new "subsidized" plan to sell the 4 GB Xbox 360 model with a Kinect sensor for $99 and a required 2-year subscription to Xbox Live for $15/month, which cunningly comes out to $360 in subscription fees.

Total cost for the "subsidized" system + 2 year subscription:  $459.

The big catch here is that you can get the same system for ~$290 and an Xbox Live subscription for ~$50/year.

Total cost of non-subsidized system: $390.

I'd go with the $70 cheaper non-subsidized system.


  

Rave: Lupine Dog Collars

I recent purchased a dog collar from Lupine at Webers Pet Supermarket.  I was impressed with Lupine right away because I had been searching for a while for a good Martingale style collar.  This was the first one I found that I liked.  Lupine advertises that their collars are completely guaranteed, even if chewed.  After a few weeks, my dog decided to "snack" on the collar.  I dropped the chewed remains into an envelope, mailed it to Lupine and had a replacement within a couple of weeks.  Lupine Rocks!